Abbott: A Communiqué From The Leftist Central Committee
[TRANSMISSION BEGINS]
Greetings, sisters and brothers of the underground movement the Australian Left.
It is with no small amount of righteous glee that we greet the Partyroom accession of Tony Abbott to the Leadership of the Federal Parliamentary Liberal Party. Such violent cupidity is typical of the imperialist hyenas in the Coalition. In this time of crisis it is no longer possible for these enemies of the people to hide behind more palatable puppets as Turnbull or Hockey. Every action further reveals them either as dangerous tools or as “village idiots”—as Mr Tuckey shamelessly quipped.
That Mr Abbott is a reactionary droog whose every thought is counter to the interests of all peace-loving people of the globe will be our movement’s most powerful tool. We will use the weight of the reactionaries to bring them down upon themselves—weak in its own ideology, the monster cannot support its own mass.
However, this is not the same as simply asserting that Mr Abbott is a Catholic. That’s just vaguely sectarian innuendo. C’mon people we can do better than that. The Central Committee hereby forbids such juvenilia upon pain of summary wedgie.
No seriously man give me the microphone back I’ll kick yer arse back to
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arleeshar wrote:
I received seventeen text messages at about 10am today, all from excited anti-Catholics. We live in interesting times.
Liam wrote:
What was the colour of the Your Rights At Work campaign? Orange.
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